One step at a time

It is amazing how comforting it is to be surrounded by friends on special occasions. Above are some pictures of my birthday party.

Why do we feel guilty being down? Isn't it part of life? There are high moments and low ones. Somehow it seems that we always want to appear strong and that the bad doesn't bother us and doesn't matter. But it does, it cuts deep inside. Realising that you might have been wrong in a belief or in your trust of someone, it hurts. Reaching a dead end and turning around is a hurtful process. Sometimes we are lucky to have an angel helping us out and applying a soothing balm on the wound by her mere presence. Thanks my angel!

I had forgotten how nice it is to be spontaneous and share a laugh with that someone. Just like children without a care in the world, just laughing at a silly thing. The delicate cocktail of silly laughs, serious talks, tender moments, intense looks, lusty kisses... Lust is pointless in itself. However with a pinch of affection and 'friendship' it becomes a most pleasurable and satisfying experience. And when both feel the lust in equal proportion, it feeds of each other and gets more intense. Lust doesn't lead to affection if in itself, but added to laughter and care for the other it leads to affection.

This is strange because it is not strange at all. The gestures between lovers are just as natural if the lovers are of different sexes as when they are of the same one. The smile when you open your eyes to a beautifull face comes with the same tenderness, the same warm feeling, which comes from the memory of the sensual pleasures of the night. It is puzzling how comfortable I am, shyness doesn't enter my mind and I openly kiss her in public places and act as I have done with my boyfriends. It is just simple, exciting and fun. She's highly attractive, she's a cheeky player, she's a reliable friend also, she's caring and attentionate. I guess if I had to categorise things, she acts more the man part of the couple or what ever we are. It is funny how we are both so scared to name us. We act like one at times, I guess we can say that we are dating, but we don't want to be called one. It seems to scare her particularly. I wonder at times if she is not scared of wha...

At different times in my life, I have told myself that I'll spend more time alone and get more comfortable about it and then life catches you and the daily rythm overwhelms you. Once again at the begining of a new year, this is coming back to haunt me: get comfortable with yourself. This time might be the right one. 2006 is off to a fresh start. I have just moved in in my new apartment that I am sharing with Su. This is a very nice place, huge. I also get a very good feeling about sharing with Su. I don't know her that much but I feel good vibes and a very comfortable feeling around her. She's one of those true friends who can be extremely blunt to you but at the same, accept you for who you are 100%. No judgment, no fake smiles, just genuine friendship. I have also moved on from my 6 years + relationship. I am not bitter or angry about it, I just feel that it has run its course and now I want to move on. I just wish he would understand it that way too, but then there is al...

Who would have thought that one day I would have a blog. I have never even kept a diary until recently. But wanting to post a comment on a friend's blog, I found myself registering and here I am... Lots of things are new in my life this 2006, so this is just one more... Let's embrace the change and enjoy each moment.